Bullies and their Victims: What to Do
Bullying Makes Life Miserable for Many Kids
Ronald L. Pitzer, Family Sociologist,
University of Minnesota Extension Service,
Asst. Professor of Social Work, College of Human Ecology;
and Positive Parenting Project Leader
There's nothing new about bullies. Most people can
remember some experience with a bully while growing
up. Unfortunately,
bullies still cause psychological and physical damage
to other kids.
Consider these figures from studies over the past ten
years:
- American schools harbor approximately 2.1 million bullies and 2.7 million of their victims.
- 77% of students in a Midwestern study say they have been
bullied.
- In an interview study of 7- to 12-year-olds in rural
Minnesota, 69% said there were bullies in their town and over 50% said
they had been picked on by these bullies. Bullying
included swearing,
teasing, throwing things, knocking them down, name-calling, and
beating.
- The National School Safety Council estimates that 525,000
"attacks, shakedowns, and robberies" occur in an average month in
public secondary schools.
- It is estimated that 160,000 children miss school every day due to fear of attack
or intimidation by other students.
These studies show bullying is most frequent in grades
2 through 6,
most serious in grades 7 through 9, and tapers off after that. Most
research indicates that 10 to 15% of children are regular victims of
bullies and that 7 to 9% of school-age children are bullies. Boys are
somewhat more likely than girls to be the victims of
bullying and are
considerably more likely to be bullies. But, interestingly,
30 to 40%
of the bullying of girls and 15 to 20% of the bullying of boys is done
by girls.
Bullies and Their Victims
It has been shown that bullies are angry kids who usually
are
bullied at home by parents, step parents or older,
bigger siblings.
Bullies generally come from families where parents
use physical means
of discipline. They may be kids reacting poorly to
divorce, death, or
other family crises. However, bullying is not normal
childhood behavior
and should not be dismissed as “kids will be kids.” This research has
shown that children who show chronic patterns of aggression
by age
eight are more likely to be involved in criminal behavior
and family
violence later in life. They are also more likely to
physically punish
or abuse their own kids. Intervention is needed to
stop this behavior
and, in many cases, professional help is needed.
Typically, assertive, self-confident children do not become victims
of bullying. Surprisingly, children who are fat, wear
glasses, or are
scholarly are no more likely to be bullied than others.
Children
usually are singled out because of psychological traits
such as extreme
passivity, sensitivity to criticism, or low self-esteem.
After
reviewing the research, psychologist David Perry concludes
that the
probability, intensity, and duration of aggression
increases if the
victim is perceived by the aggressor as deliberately
provocative;
resembles others who the aggressor has seen victimized; has a history
of yielding to the aggressor’s demands; or fails to show signs that
normally inhibit aggressive responses.
Children who are routinely victimized by bullies spend
their
childhood plagued by anxiety, insecurity, and low self-esteem. Chronic
victims of bullying probably need professional help
as much as the
bullies do.
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